If you’ve been reading my blog, you’ll know that my boyfriend is currently halfway across the world doing a summer school and travelling with his best mate basically has left me behind to deal with the horrid Scottish summer all by myself.
Me? Bitter? No. Jealous? Slightly.
As I mentioned in a previous post, in order to keep ourselves occupied during his time away we set ourselves goals and achievements to accomplish within the six week time frame, so as to distract ourselves from the distance that was suddenly keeping us apart.
However, it turns out the green eyed monster is an elusive yet poisonous little bug that will latch onto every thought in your mind when you think about your other half, and has a tendency to manifest itself more as the distance between you and your SO increases.
I’ve never thought I was a jealous person. Never. But during the first week my boyfriend was away I found myself hating the thought of him going out to any sort of club or party. South American women are hot. And I’m not just saying that. I’ve seen what they look like and just knowing he was amongst these incredibly gorgeous women made me feel uneasy.
At first I thought I was being silly, that the best thing to do was to shut it all in, and pretend that I didn’t care… I mean what boyfriend wants to hear that his girlfriend doesn’t like him going out?
This eventually meant I got upset, and being upset with half a world between you becomes a bigger deal when you aren’t physically present to console the other person.
So we talked it out. The most important thing in a relationship- and I will maintain this forever because I 100% believe it- is openness and communication. I was driving myself crazy with all sorts of images and scenarios, and when I brought them up to my little snuggle nugget, he brushed my insecurities aside.
If he had any intention of getting with other women, he would never have gone into this long-distance palaver in the first place. He felt the exact same about me going out, drinking and dancing, and as long as we kept each other updated for peace of mind, there was no harm in going out and having fun. Phew.
It’s stressful. My eating has been erratic because I’ve not been myself the last few weeks. I’m not sleeping properly, and I feel lonely. But that’s what life is about, learning to cope with difficult situations.
Cheesy as it sounds, if we weren’t as madly in love with each other as we are, we would never have gone down this road of keeping our relationship going overseas, and honestly, being apart will just make us appreciate each other even more when we’re together again.
Have faith, trusting isn’t easy, but it is possible.