So, recently I started listening to The Guilty Feminist, a podcast hosted by Deborah Frances-White and Sofie Hagen, and is a very real, usually blunt discussion on how we do, as 21st century women, want to make a difference in the world and see that men and women have equal opportunities (I’m not here to drill the idea of feminism into you, I promise), but also discusses how, as 21st century women, we are loaded with ‘hypocrisies and insecurities that undermine these goals and views.’
At the beginning of every episode, they play this game call ‘I’m a feminist but…’ and they take it in turns to say that line before telling us something that is deemed hypocritical for a feminist to do. For example, Deborah once said:
‘I’m a feminist but… if I were at a dinner with Amy Schumer, and Ellen DeGeneres, and Jon Hamm (from Mad Men) called and asked what I was doing, I’d drop everything and go to him.’
Which I agree with, because as would I, and I really can’t get enough of how the podcast is structured and delivered. Each week, a different theme is discussed- from boobs to anger to boundaries to worth- honestly, every relevant topic you can think of, they cover it. And, in line with these subjects, the women encourage each other to do challenges throughout the week preceding the recording of the podcast. So, for example, one week the subject was going to be exercise, and Sofie, a self-proclaimed hater of all exercise, challenged herself to go and do a yoga class. I think these challenges they do encourage us as listeners to take stock of what we do in our own lives, and challenge ourselves to push our boundaries a little more than we perhaps already do.
Now, I’m new to the podcast game, so I understand that I’m quite far behind in the episodes, but have been trying to play catch up as best as I can, and also managed to get Mr OneBigStressball to join in, which has been interesting, as it give way to more in-depth conversations that last ages, and in turn not only gives him an insight on the ways a woman’s mind works, but it also gives me a cheeky little view on how he thinks, and what things we agree or disagree on. I mean, it could get dangerous. Who knows, one day we might come across a topic that I feel really strongly against and he’s totally in favour of, but I guess that’s a hurdle that future Miss and Mr OneBigStressball can deal with.
But anyway, the point of this post.
I’ve been listening to the Guilty Feminist for so long and at such length now that it’s infecting my subconscious as well as my conscious day-to-day thinking. I’m not even joking, it’s scary.
Last week at work, I went up to a customer to ask him what he wanted to drink, and began by saying ‘Oh, sorry…’
Apologising without having done something wrong is a Guilty Feminist no-no, I’m telling you. I hadn’t realised until that moment how many times I necessarily apologise and say sorry to people in the day, and 9 times out of 10 I’ve not done anything wrong in the slightest. So I literally looked at the customer, and said ‘Nope, I take that apology back. What I mean to say is, excuse me, would you like anything to drink?’
The customer looked at me like I’d sprouted a moustache and asked for a latte. It was while making this latte that I realised that this strange man had no idea that I was listening to a very inspiring podcast, and that’s why I had taken my apology back. He must have thought I had Tourettes or something. (I did go back over to give him his coffee and I did explain myself, don’t worry guys.)
But that was nothing compared to what I did the other night.
Now, about a week and a half ago, I listened to the Representation episode of the Guilty Feminist, and in it, Deborah actually started a new panel show that is sexually and racially inclusive and now a successful podcast (it’s called Global Pillage and again, worth a listen if you want to) and Sofie, having decided that females are under-represented in the world of ministers, got ordained online. At the time, I thought she was so cool doing that… imagine, just like that she became a minister, representing the minority sex in a world that is almost completely dominated by men (I didn’t do a huge amount of research but I think in the percentage of women in ministerial positions is 24%, and that’s within religion with the highest representation of females.)
Anyway, I listened to that episode, an all but forgot about Sofie’s challenge. At least I thought I had. On Friday night, I went out in Sydney with a few friends, and, not intentionally – though I didn’t protest it happening- vodka and tequila shots made an appearance, and I don’t really remember getting home… or talking to Mr OneBigStressball on the phone before bed.
Don’t worry guys, I paid for it the next day. It hurt my head to speak, my body felt like it wasn’t sitting right no matter how I lay on my bed, and for a little while I genuinely thought I was going to die, and cried like a baby because I thought it was my last day on earth and that Mr OneBigStressball was going have to pay thousands of pounds to get my body sent back to the UK.
I did survive though, it’s all good. I lived to see another day, and in contrary to my normal 6am starts, I got up at two o’clock in the afternoon, and had my first meal of the day at three, when I was 90% sure that it wouldn’t get projectile vomited over the living room floor. Turns out, the food isn’t what made me want to throw up… As I sat down and checked my emails, I saw this:
Yep. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, I got ordained. My drunken self, at 3am after a night out decided that I wanted to be a minister. I blame Sofie Hagen. And I think because the Australian news has been inundated with the progress of the same sex marriage bill, a part of me wanted to become a minister in the hopes that I could marry people and make them happy. I know I can’t do that, and because I have no recollection of even doing this, I think it’s void (thank goodness it seems that I didn’t have to pay for it) but it’s the thought that counts right? That, or the inner feminist in me is well and truly angry about something and wanted to help represent the female gender like Sofie Hagen did…
Either way, though I don’t know where the thought came from to get myself ordained, at least my drunken intentions were good. And at least I didn’t pay for anything. Imagine if I’d gone onto Amazon and bought myself a toilet shaped mug or something?
Ps, before I get any hate comments, I know I am not qualified in any way to marry people (even though I’d love to) so I will not be doing that.